Spiders, Reprogramming and Bruce Lee…

If you ask people what they are most afraid of, I think, in my decidedly unprofessional opinion, that a good number of them will say death/dying… or, you know, spiders.  Because really, spiders?  They’re just freaky.  Although, I do thank those pesky 8-leggers muchly for their voracious appetite for all things ant and pest-like.

But, where was I?   Ah, yes, fear.  I have a different theory on what people are most afraid of… being themselves.  Human behavior fascinates me and from what I’ve observed, more often than not, is that people are really afraid to be themselves.  There’s a fear of doing this, or doing that, or being this, or wanting that because of what someone else might think about it.  People, subconsciously or not, let someone else’s opinion determine their own self-worth.  I should know because I was certainly like that.  In fact, despite my newfound self-awareness, I am still like that.  The process of reprogramming your brain after a lifetime of being shown and being told that it matters what other people think is incredibly difficult.  I still struggle with it in many ways.  Just the other day, I caught myself trying to justifying my new “Nomadic Life Plan” to someone that didn’t quite understand, or approve.  It’s just something I’m going to need to deal with and get over if I want to be truly happy.

When I first let people know of my plan, a friend told me she thought I was brave.  My immediate thought was, “Sweet.  First time I’ve been called brave.” Funny, but I never thought of my future life as brave.  Initially, I thought of it as more of an escape. It is scary, though.  And I am most definitely scared.  But it’s also exciting and something I know I absolutely need to do for myself.  I’ve placed a lot of limits on my life based on what my friends, family, and society has told me is acceptable and/or unacceptable.  But I think all it did was stifle my own growth as a person.  I feel like I’ve grown more in the past 6-7 months than I have in my entire 38 years on Mama Earth… and to think, all it took was an uber traumatic breakup.  Blargh.

Well, like Bruce said, “I treasure the memory of the past misfortunes.  It has added more to my bank of fortitude.”

And to continue with the whole Bruce Lee meme thing, I will also leave you with this little gem…

Let’s get rid of our limits and start Living, my Friends.

I, for one, can’t wait to see what amazing places our lives will take us.

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